The Hold Me Tight Workshop is an education program based on the theory and practice of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT). EFT is an empirically tested model of couple therapy that has shown excellent outcomes with many different kinds of couples. EFT views the central problem in a distressed relationship as the loss of secure emotional connection and the pattern of negative interactions that both reflects and perpetuates this loss. Compelling emotional signals that are meant to pull a partner closer or reduce conflict become distorted and shaded with criticism, anger or apparent indifference. Negative spirals of interaction then erode trust and continually exacerbate each partner’s natural vulnerabilities and sense of isolation. EFT helps partners to take control of this negative dance and to clarify their emotional signals about attachment needs and fears in a way that encourages their partner to respond with love and compassion. A new emotional experience of secure connection, a sense that the other person can be Accessible, Responsive, and Engaged (A.R.E.) transforms love relationships. Partners can then shape A.R.E. conversations that offer a positive answer to the key question, “Are you there for me?” Partners who are able to openly reach for and connect with each other can create the effective dependency that makes for a safe haven bond. This kind of bond promotes the growth and resilience of both individuals.
The Hold Me Tight Workshop is designed around conversations based on the Hold Me Tight book, all of which have been shown to be essential to successful relations. You will learn how to understand and improve your relationship through presentations by the workshop leaders, private exercises and conversations with your partner and by watching video demonstrations of other couples.